Cycle, Return

11 months.

That’s how long it took for my cycle to return this time.

I know, I know. We were all sitting there, pondering my ovaries and follicle stimulating hormone, wondering “Hm, is her period going to come back this month or what?”

The actual period was totally normal. But my ovulation pain is whack. It used to only last 36 hours or so, but this time I had my initial “pinch” (more like an acute stab with a sharp knife) on Thursday night and was in labor-like pain until Monday morning.

And I do mean labor-like. It’s the same cramping in my uterus, the same pain in every muscle of my pelvic floor, as labor. Except it lasts for four days.

My friends throw out ideas like IUD and ablation (why is this a thing now?) and I’m like NO FREAKING WAY. I’m so sick of doctors with penises trying to do stuff to me. I’m just going to continue to suffer so that I can lord it over my family’s heads:

“YOU DID THIS TO MEEEEEEE!”

One thought on “Cycle, Return

  1. My first cycle after my second was born was so horribly intense I actually went to the hospital during ovulation because I thought I had pelvic inflammatory disease or something. Turns out, just ovulating! HA! I was 13 months post partum. After my third it felt like things were trying to "gear up" for a while and it hurt, but I think at that point I just knew what was coming. But my trip to the ER for ovulation was pretty embarrassing, especially since I'm not particularly worrisome about things like that. So, literally, I feel your pain babe. xo
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